Updated: Jul 28, 2020
Our girls are not just good friends, they are goal friends
Everyday they're hustlin'
When they were little they had a lemonade stand. Now when life gives them lemons they're still making lemonade.
"You were the one I always told on, now you're the one I always lean on."
Always Sisters Always Friends
A phrase that would most likely cause a war in my household as a kid is, "Oooow, I'm telling!!!" Most often the person who yelled those infamous words was the person who instigated the ordeal to begin with.
My daughters remind me of my sister and myself. Uniquely different in every way. Their weaknesses and strengths compliment one another perfectly. I always prayed my girls would be good friends because when I was little my sister and I were not. I didn't like my little sister. And yet she loved me dearly. Now that I'm older, my sister is one of my closest friends. She is loyal, funny, reliable and smart. I can't imagine my life without her. My sister would be the best business partner because her natural strengths mask my weaknesses. Her straight forwardness is the perfect medicine to balance my artsy ways.
My girls learned at a young age how celebrate one another's uniqueness. Of course, they have their normal sister stuff, but it's nothing like the continuous contention I grew up with as a kid. Here's an example of how different they are, one day it was time to clean and I said, "OK ladies, it's time to clean and we need all hands on deck!"
Trinity responds, "OK Mom, can we listen to Bach? Beethoven is great for studying, but Bach is better for cleaning."
Amiya responds, "Mama, can we please listen to Pac? (As in Tupac Shakur)
I love it! I got too tickled by how they share the same room and seemingly come from two different worlds.
Trinity, our oldest daughter, is an artist in every way. She writes, illustrates, sings, plays, dances, composes, and loves to study her Bible and foreign language. Trinity is an introvert whose idea of a good time is spending the day working on her novel, worshiping at her keyboard, or online practicing linguistic skills with a friend overseas.
Amiya, our youngest daughter, is a straight A student who is a filmmaker, actress, culinary artist, gym shoe addict, avid Netflix watcher, seasoned babysitter (sassy kids are her specialty), and she's involved in seven social clubs at school. Plus she works and runs track.
As different as they appear, they actually have much in common. They are goal oriented, hard workers, who love Jesus and operate in excellence and integrity. They encourage one another to pursue their passions and they help one another reach their goals. They pray for one another and look for ways to lighten the other one's load.
When I think about the foolishness I fostered as a kid, and all the years I missed out on being friends with my sister, it breaks my heart. With our creativity and entrepreneurial aspirations we could have collaborated, accomplished so much, loved each other well, and had lots of fun along the way.
My best-selling book Stop Write There was birthed out of my desire to see people create from a pure place. Offense contaminates the creative process. If you are hurt by the church, someone in leadership, or perhaps a good friend, it's far too easy to give up on your goals. Perhaps you are reading this and it's causing you to reflect on the areas in which you've been stuck, if that's the case then you are in the right place. God uniquely designed us with different relational needs. It's OK to not be OK, and when you're not OK, it's OK to place yourself in an environment to get what you need to heal so you can be OK.
There is a Dr. King quote that says, "We must learn to live together as brothers. Or perish together as fools." If there is someone that you love, but you currently don't like because of your differences, turn on some Bach, or Pac, and do some deep cleaning in your soul. Life is too short to allow judgement or grudgement keep you from dwelling in unity with your goal friends.